Expectations...

Expectations…
Prospect, outlook, opportunity, hope, anticipation, probability.. These are the words that are suggested as the synonyms of the word ‘expectation’
Do they really? Somehow, I don’t understand words like opportunity in connection with the word ‘expectation’.

I was patient with this situation of handling ‘Expectations’ (at the domestic level). But seemingly, these expectations start going out of hand creating issues between people with whom you are related closely in life.
Fortunately, till date, I have not exceedingly disappointed someone in their expectations from me (at least those people who matter to me!). But since many months I can see this ‘not fulfilling expectations’ jargon brewing in my house. It is difficult for me to understand this situation as a third person.
In today’s industry, there are a lot of expectations from you as an employee because you are being paid a huge amount of salary for the job you do. So it whatever you do should be perfect, neat, clean..
But to top it, the moment you reach home you have another set of expectations.. from parents, children, their spouses, in-laws, friends, relatives.. everyone…
And when these expectations are not fulfilled, there are a huge amount of issues that start piling up. Some said. Some unsaid. And then one day, a small instance is good enough to trigger these past memories and the anger, deep inside, boils out like a volcano burning even the smallest remnants of the relationship you had.

‘People never forget the way you made them feel’
It is true. This volcano of anger that bursts creates a still deeper and wider valley between you and the people whom you call your own!
Sad situation.. And sadder to see it happen with people around you!

This brings me to a basic question. Why do you have an expectation from any other person?
May be because you have done something for him / her and now want that person to pay back?
Well, this is the only reason I can think of. You don’t have expectations from people whom you barely know. You do have expectations from people for whom, in life, you have done something significant!
I’ll be glad to find some alternative answers!

I feel shocked when parents accuse their kids of not fulfilling their expectations and I am enraged when kids say that their parents don’t fulfill their expectations! On top of that, these expectations are unsaid. There is an expectation from either that the other should understand these unsaid expectations and fulfill them!! OKAY!! Now I am starting to get confused!

In the first place, I DO NOT understand why you have to have expectations from anyone? And that too your kids or parents of all people!
I have heard parents say, ‘we have done so much for you, brought you up, educated you, and got you married so you must do as we say!’
I have heard the kids say to their parents, ‘well, whats the big deal if you have done so much for us, it was your duty to!!’
Dear parents, I know you have done so many things for your kids. Fed them, went to the extent of starving yourself so that your kids could relish themselves on the food, sent them to good schools, celebrated their birthdays in a grand way, sat by their bedside when they were not well, got them married to the person of their choice.. you have done everything that was in your extent. Was this just because it was duty to do these things cauz you brought the kid into this world? Was this done with a sense of obligation? I don’t think so. It simply because you love your kid! Then I do not understand why you price tag your love by having them fulfill your expectations in return!
And the kids, you must be damn grateful that your parents did all these things for you. They could have just thrown in you in an orphanage for all they care! But they do care. They have made so many sacrifices for you which you are probably not even aware of. And it was not mandatory for them to have done what they did. So please, be grateful for the fact that you got these kind of parents! and do not show your ungratefulness by saying such things.. for you have to remember, that you will have kids one day and please pray to God, that they dont share your attitude!!

Well, I wish I was allowed to speak these words to the people who I want to tell this to. But I don’t think S will ever allow me to do it!

Anyways, what I feel is that you must not have expectations from anyone. Anyone at all! Even if the person is the world to you. Keeping expectations just has more chances of them to break. That makes you unhappy. That makes the person unhappy from whom you expect something and he/she is not able to fulfill them. It breaks your heart, you get into stupid fights, and inspite of all this, the frustration is all yours!

Well, it seems from the post, that I am getting frustrated now. I actually am.

So this is the most abrupt end of the post. Please tell me what you think of the issue and is this prominent with most of the houses?