Mixed day

Yesterday was a mixed day. It started bad. went on to be good as the time passed. it ended excellent.
Morning was bad because we were only 2 people in our department instead of the usual six. it went on to be good because we were doing fine, just the two of us. but the situation started taking a u-turn when there were a dozen trials to be taken and a lot of samples to be checked. and then there was this visit from an official for issuing a necessary document. things went worst when SR started having health problems and had to go home early. so there i was, alone in the department. on top of that, there was a major raw material issue on the floor. and, unfortunately (or fortunately for me) 2 machines were down. so there were no tests to be done, so i could complete the other work which was pending. finally, at 1500 hrs, TRI arrived and i breathed a sigh of relief.
I was disappointed with my self. with all these activities to be done, i panicked. i convinced myself that this was the first time and it was natural to be so and next time things wud be handled in a better way. but still, i panicked! there is no excuse to that!
This was Tuesday.
Lot of things happened between that day to this day (friday, the 24th). i got my eye swollen.. no. no one hit me on the eye. i just got infected with Stye on my left upper eyelid. so it has swollen so much that my eye is half shut. Visits to the doctors have increased in the past three days. Everyday evening i am going to some doctor or the other! oh! what has happened to me. i never required going to a doctor for days together and now here i am at some or the other clinic everyday.
Work is good. work environment is getting horrible. people behave nice, think something else. its pathetic. for once, i feel i should be working in a different team. this lot sucks. not proud to say it, but i dont have any ideas nor the energy to put efforts to change the situation. i tried. i failed. i tried again. i failed again. third time, i am not so comfortable with the idea. and i dont want to waste my time trying to do something that i know will not happen.
tomorrow starts diwali and we are going to Goa. first time in my life i am going to go to goa. pathetic, i know. but still, its never too late is it? we will be spending 3 days there and then we are back to our home for Diwali. I wanted to spend Diwali somewhere else. some secluded, silent place. but all such destinations were already full 2 months ago. and those available were unaffordable for our current available finances. and S has his work to complete which could never happen had we stayed in Goa for the entire week.
the 3 days in Goa, S is going to make most of the time taking photographs. he wanted to go on a photography expedition for a long time, but it somehow was left out. so this time, he is going to have a great time.
things at home are good. life is busy. to my delight, my cold has reduced a lot. i get sound sleep during the night. its still not gone 100% but is much better now. because of the infection to my eye, i am now wearing my glasses all the time i am awake (happy news for S and maa) and the better part of it is that i am planning to make it a habit even after the infection goes away. hope it works out.

Wishing you all a very Happy and prosperous Diwali.... May the love and friendships in your life grow stronger by the day.
Have a lovely festival of lights. and try not to burst too many crackers...
Be safe....
M

Life is short...

Life is short. Break the rules. Forgive quickly. Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably, and never regret anything that made you smile.

One party is over!!

Its been a long time since me and S have been planning to call a lot of people to our home for dinner. things were not happening somehow and plans were getting canceled. Either i used to be busy, or sushil unavailable. but finally, yesterday, we made it and called one of the families we were wanting to since a long time.
The menu was short and i made most of the things at home except 'puran poli', which we decided to get from outside. things wrapped up quite quickly and did not become hectic at all since i had a holiday and there will be no hangover to office too since today is a holiday too!!
office is hectic and tomorrow i have a presentation where i am going to be butchered! so now, rest of the day will be spent in preparing for the presentation and doing the touchups.
home is good too. we were planning to shift into another house. but we didnt find anything suitable. nothing was comparable to our current home. the location, the space available and everything.... all the new apartment constructions the houses seem to be very small, though the area (in sq. mts) is the same as our current apartment. i, personally dont want to move. but it is S's parents who want to shift from here, since our apartment is on the second floor with no lift. they are not in a fit state to climb up. anyways, so we had halted the plans for sometime now but S's father is insisting that we do something about shifting. so i am going to make some calls today and probably try visiting some of the places which i can by myself.
to my delight my in-laws are quite in harmony with us now a days. probably their desperation to move to this house has increased ten fold. my in laws seem to be unable to stand their own son and DIL now.
this reminds me, a couple of years back, i had gone to a person who tells your past, present and future just by taking 2 informations from you-first is ur thumb print and the second is ur birthdate and birth time. well, i am not really a big fan of fortune tellers, but this was definitely different. i cant call him a fortune teller. its not a science either, but just for information visit this site to know more...
http://www.sundaytimes.lk/021124/plus/1.html
so, anyways, on these 2 pieces of information he had taken from me, he told me my name, my parents name, my sisters name, my husbands name... well... it had started getting interesting. anyways, i will not write everything here, but he had predicted that my BIL and FIL would end up having huge disagreements.. so intense that they would go to an extreme.
S said, this was NOT possible. BIL was not married that time.
the time to come was to unfold the tale. and it happened. it happened just the way that person had told us. is it a co-incidence, i know not. but he also told me that you will have to take care of ur in-laws. well, with one prediction having become a concrete reality, i said, well this is almost happening too. and so, i have decided to shed all the things that have gone wrong in the past and start afresh. yes, i had said that now i am becoming a 'never forget nor forgive' kind of a person. but now i am mentally prepared to make an exception to that.

A change...

Lot of changes. but its good to have a change. to have something new around you. thats why the change in the template. i like the format of it so much that i didnt mind letting go of the upgraded templates and had to revert back to the classic template. anyways, there is always an option available for reverting to my original template..
so, enjoy the change for a while....

Rock On...

Tell me the problem – again. Yet again. But I managed to come up with concerns that really matter now. apart from people, apart from their attitude, the things which we need to concentrate. So, we need to ‘Rock On’... just using the words because we saw the movie yesterday...
Nice movie. I would rate it 3. not 4, 3.
Performances by all are excellent and Prachi Desai (to my liking) had a lot of scenes. She is good. So is everyone else. No one has over acted. No one is expressionless. But the story doesn’t have the excitement. You know what is going to happen in the end (ofcourse u know in every movie.. ‘happy endings!’ barring some like RDB) but still you are curious as to where the story is leading (like chak de India.. I mean, we all know that India is going to win in the end!). But somehow, I felt that lacking here.
Secondly, when the ‘Magik’ re-unites, I felt the hyper-emotion missing. It was a simple re-union. I mean Joe and Aditya should have be overwhelmed at the moment of re-union. But it was missed, somehow.
Apart from this, the movie is great. Music is good. I will not say great, because personally I am not a huge fan of ‘Rock music’ and secondly, the popular song ‘socha hai..’ was missing from the movie. I was waiting till the end for that song to screen, but it didn’t happen. So there was some disappointment.
Short movie, smart movie and one which you can relate to.
Enough reasons, I say, to go and watch it once.
With my track record, I will watch the movie again. And I hope I will like it better next time!
edited to add: i missed the first 10 mins of the movie and hence missed the song 'socha hai....' so that states the need to rewatch the movie!!! [:)]

Pravs world - I shall transform...

I do not ask to walk smooth paths nor bear an easy load.
I pray for strength and fortitude to climb the rock strewn road.

Give me such courage and I can scale the hardest peaks alone;
And then I shall learn to transform every stumbling block into a stepping stone.

I really dont know what to title this one!

Things are moving ahead and I am being pushed to perform. I am happy and scared at the same time because there are so many expectations from me. And I dread the moment when and if people will come and tell me that I could not fulfill those expectations. This fear outperforms my desire to work and I get a huge setback, being able to do nothing of the things I am supposed to do.
Again this time, I am relying on the fact that writing these things will help me abate the fear and start working in the right direction. Believing in the saying that ‘better late than ever’, I will be atleast partially be able to fulfill the expectations people have of me.
Things at home are fine. Nothing special. We celebrated S’s birthday in a different way. It was not planned really. Things just unfolded on the spur of the moment. First, BB was going to give a party in Pizza hut. And me and s had planned to go out for dinner with family. His side of the ‘so called’ family; meaning his parents, brother and sis in law weren’t going to come. This we understood in the afternoon of S’s birthday. They had to go to the sis in laws sisters place for dinner. Pathetic. I know! But, I don’t think I missed anything in life because of their absence. I cudnt be more glad. S was upset. Of course. But its time he realizes what his ‘so called family’ is and how much he means to them.
He wont realize this, the way he is. He will forget the way they have treated him in a couple of hours. Ironically, that’s what I love the most about him. Forgive and forget. He preaches it and practices at all times in his life.
But me, I used to be ‘forgive but never forget’. Slowly, I am turning into ‘neither forgive, nor forget’. Its life. I have become like this because of the choices I have made. And I know that the choices I make are going to create some sparks in our life. But people here are ‘I-me-myself’. A bang is needed to make them aware that the world apart from them exists. I don’t care. But it matters to me that atleast S’s family realizes that he is not happy with what is going on.
So, was telling about S’s birthday. So his ‘family’ was not going to be there. Probably they didn’t think it was important enough to be there with the member of their ‘family’.
I am channeling my anger thru him. I am not totally correct on my part doing this. but i didnt see any other way. so i made the choice.
Aso, so S had come to pick me up at pizza hut. And when everyone from my office came to know that he is outside, they insisted to call him in. Then he came, sat with us, ate pizza and chit-chatted. There is a custom in PHut that all the boys there sing a song for the birthday boy/girl. So AD insisted that we tell them it was S’s birthday. We did, and they sang a hip-hop birthday song. And everyone applauded. Everyone apart from the people with whom he feels so close was there for him on his birthday.
Then we went for dinner (we didn’t eat that much pizza!!). Kay, her daughter and her hubby joined us too along with my mum n dad. We had a nice light dinner. Had a laugh. Had a nice time together. At the end of the day I was happy the way we spent his birthday. But he was not entirely. He couldn’t understand the reason for his family not being there with him the day he had successfully lived the 27th year of his life. He still doesn’t!

theres nothing worst than this that can happen!

Days turn into nights and nights give way to days. And time passes. Very fast.
Things change. And so have I, in many aspects of life. Yes, AGAIN!
I have become harsh with S especially when it comes to his parents and brother and his admission process. Perhaps because I was subdued with my team in the office. But now the things have turned around. Rather BB has asked me to turn things around.
Take one!
‘When u are in a leadership position, never try hard to remain in the good books of team. If u work in a way where you always want people to like you, ur team will never be successful’
eyes widened, mouth hanging half open... I was listening. Mentally I made a note to strangle myself for not realizing this earlier.
Take two
‘People need to understand that u are working for the company and this is not personal. And if people take this personally, it is their problem not yours’
Take three
‘you have the entire support of the management. When you have any issues, at any time, just tell us. That’s all you have to do.’
Geared up. But still a bit skeptical. Lets see how things turn out.
Hope for the best because there is nothing worst that can happen.

looong time...... i have been gone again for quite some time.
there is been a reason.. i have been very busy. first office, then home, then laziness of not taking the pains to write. then this horrific cough and cold and fever.
i am better now. not entirely. but much better than what i was yesterday. i am taking about 12 tablets (purely medicinal) / day. i have never taken so many tablets / day in my entire lifetime! well, circumstances change, dont they?
so lifes going fine. not too bad not too good either.
one of my collegues left the company. he was a sort of guide, a mentor to me. yes, guess that, i did shed some tears on his last day. unexpected to me too. but i felt bad. specially for the reason he left the organization.
personal life is going good. about time my in-laws will move back into the house we are staying. enduring 6 months of their presence is going to be no short of an 'agni pariksha!' i dont know how i will be able to take it this one more time specially after what all happened in the past few months. times are testing. unkindly..
well, i will leave now. unexpected, untimely and abrupt. but there is something more important which i am trying to dig up... laters.......

When the sun rises........

Every morning in Africa, When the Sun rises,
A deer awakens, Knowing it has to outrun the fastest Lion,
Or, be hunted to death...

But... When the Sun rises,
A lion awakens, Knowing it has to outrun the slowest deer,
Or, be starved to death...

It does not matter whether you are a deer or lion,
When the Sun rises,
Better be running at your best...